Thursday, November 8, 2012

For that, Starbucks should be expensive!

Starbuck is a character in Moby Dick, aka the Great White Whale. Aside from the fact that Herman Melville's writing sucks harder than a Dyson, I enjoy a good perverted allegory. Maybe he didn't mean for "Moby Dick" and "White Whale" to sound like uncreative names for pornos, but they just do.

Beckett: "They call you The White Whale."
Castle: "Really? Not Moby Dick?"
 So, with that digression of intellect in mind, look closely at the Starbucks logo. I have no idea why she has two tails. It seems like that would make it extremely difficult to swim. But she's got two tails, and she's got them spread wide, pulled up by her head. Look - it's mermaid porn! You can't unsee this now! She's a total ho-bag, spread eagle, waiting for Moby Dick!

(Perhaps I need a nap. Or some coffee.)

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